Facial Relations

On Martin Luther King Jr. Day, I watched a Sidney Poitier movie and served my skin by getting a long, slow, painful facial.

24 hours later my face is killing me.

Lucy the stringent esthetician with a thick Russian accent demanded that I book a 90 minute facial with her so she could probe my pores. She was relentless and went where other estheticians did not dare to go.  They’d always give me the excuses of “we don’t have enough time today to work in that area, so I’ll just massage you and put a mask on.”  I even went to a dermatologist who looked at my issue of weird combo skin evidence and said, “There’s nothing we can do about it, it’s just how it’s going to be.”  A doctor, who didn’t want to treat it.  Hmm. Surprising. Not.

Lucy was fearless. But as she removed her pith helmet and magnifying glass, she said, “You staying home today.”

I thought it was a question. I said, “well, I need to run some errands…”

She replied, “No, you stay home today.”

So that’s how I ended up watching the foxy Sidney Poitier.

She had asked me to bring in alllll my products so she could examine ingredients under her magnifying lens.  “This no good. Give this to a friend. This not for you. Throw this away. Use this up but do not buy more. Aah, this is very good.”  

And I showed her what I used for my foundation, just tinted moisturizers that promised illumination and glow.

“What is THIS?” she said, looking at the Olay Color Recapture with disdain. “Why you use THIS?” she said, shaking the Stila Illuminating Tinted Moisturizer with SPF 15 at me. 

I explained, “I blend the two together, put them on the whole face…”   She looked at my face as if I were insane.  What, she has never read an issue of Allure?

“No.  Stop. They are all chemicals.  Do not use except on little spots if you want to cover.”

“But then what do I… ?”

“Listen.  I know what I talking about, you listen to me.”

Yes, Lucy.

I then looked in the mirror and realized why she told me to stay home. It looked like I had the measles, covered with spackle.  She directed, “Put calamine lotion on the spots over night, they’ll be gone in the morning.” 

Since she totally dissed the cleansers I had, which was OK because they are almost gone, I said, “well, tell me what you’d recommend.”

She gave me this Camphor Souffle stuff. She said, “It’s not expensive.” Nope,  only $13 and it will last a good long time. It smells DISGUSTING.  I used it today, and I can still smell my face.

To top it off, the evidence of my ferocious facial is NOT gone, Miss Lucy, it's still all over my face, I look like I am recovering from chicken pox, plus she did something to my sinuses so I feel crappy.

So, now I’m in the market for a new foundation. I need it to be "less chemicals" to satisfy my new kapitan. I really do need people to direct me in my surface management so I welcome her bossiness.

 Any suggestions for natural makeup brands that you have tried? 

What about Carmindy's Sally Hansen line?  

I’ll be trotting off to Sephora and/or Ulta this week.

Comments

[Peeved Michelle]

I have been using this Korres tinted moisturizer I got at Sephora. I really like it. Nice coverage, but light. Natural ingredients. I use it over Urban Decay's foundation primer. http://bit.ly/6sE8O8

[blaugra]

Thanks Michelle, I have tried samples of Korres stuff but never the tinted moisturizer. I like Korres!

[KtP]

I refuse to try anything Carmindy has because I feel she only wears floaty, airy clothes and she should learn to dress for her shape.

I like the MAC foundation I got this month but it's probably all chemicals. However, my friends did exclaim that it made my skin "dewy," so that's hard to beat.